屁屁影院入口

PR: MattForgenti

Once Minhyuk’s plan was all set, he immediately started to walk towards where Aruvel was. The Demon World was generally dark since the sun did not rise in their world. There were also various traps and illusions set up in every corner to fool the unsuspecting users. When Minhyuk arrived at the place where Aruvel was supposed to be, he was suddenly subjected to an ant hell. Although Minhyuk, Kongie and Conir were all sucked in an ant hell, they did not fall into panic.

Then, at that moment……

“How dare you step foot in here, you fools!”

They heard a gloomy and dark voice ringing loudly in the area. Then, the notifications began to ring.

[You have met with the Demon World’s Sage, Aruvel.]

[You have a 200 level difference with this monster.]

[Extreme fear has been triggered.]

Warnings would ring once one encountered a being that was at least 200 levels higher than your current self. This was always the case in the Demon World. It was because the Demon World remained to be a place that was still yet to be explored. It was an unexplored area where the demons were 1.3x stronger than when they were in the human world. In other words, if the Lv400 demons that Minhyuk easily hunted in the human world exerted their power in this place, they would be able to exert the power of a Lv500 being.

And right now, Sage Aruvel was holding a bright red spear in his hands.

“Die!!!”

At that moment, hundreds of spearlights from Aruvel’s spear flooded Minhyuk’s vision.

‘I’ll never win against that.’

Minhyuk was not a fool. He did not need to clash against him just so he could know if they could win or not against him. He could already tell his strength by just the force that he showed with that one attack. Seeing the attack, Minhyuk quickly shouted.

“Let’s Have a Meal!!!”

[An invincible barrier has now been created with a radius of 5m. You cannot release an attack towards your enemies.]

[There is a high chance of receiving a higher ranked dish when cooking buffed dishes for your party members, guild members and vassals. The party will receive the buff effect accordingly.]

A transparent, round barrier with a radius of five meters was created in a flash. The spearlights that were flying slammed straight into the barrier.

Baaaaaaaaang―

The spearlights that struck the barrier were deflected and flew away. The invincible barrier was truly unbreakable but the impact still remained.

Bang, bang, bang―!

Aruvel slammed the barrier with all his might.

“You’re cowards for putting up such things!”

Meanwhile, Minhyuk was thinking inside of the barrier.

‘The effects of Let’s Have a Meal will depend on how I use it.’

Skills and abilities would have different effects and efficiency depending on how they were used.

Then, Minhyuk spoke……

“Hehe. Aruvel-nim, hello! I couldn’t greet you properly because you suddenly attacked me but I’m Minhyuk. As a matter of fact, I heard that Aruvel-nim was quite a gourmand so I came here to treat you to a meal.”

“Stop playing tricks on me!”

But Aruvel did not listen to his words as he continued to strike the barrier fiercely.

“I really don’t want to fight Aruvel-nim. How am I even supposed to fight against you?”

“I told you to stop playing tricks on me……!”

Aruvel’s expression was clearly filled with anger. Minhyuk couldn’t help but sigh as he took out his grill. He looked like he did not have any other choice. Then, he started grilling pork galbi on the grill.

Sizzle―

The dark sauce that coated and marinated the ribs made a loud and sizzling sound as soon as the ribs  made contact with the grilling pan.

Then, the tempting smell wafted over and entered Aruvel’s nose.

***

‘Who the hell is this guy?’

He suddenly appeared in front of him and said that he wanted to treat him to a meal since he was a gourmand. And when he couldn’t communicate with him properly, he just sat down and began to grill an unknown meat in front of him.

‘But the meat that the humans cooked back then was really delicious.’

Aruvel was shocked when he tasted human food back when he went to their world. The only dishes that they ate in the Demon World were raw meat from the demonic monsters and plants that tasted like rotten eggs. On the contrary, the human world had pigs, cows, chickens and vegetables that tasted fresh and sweet.

Suddenly, a mouthwatering smell tickled the tips of his nose.

‘N, no. What kind of smell is this that can make my heart tremble this much……!’

Aruvel’s eyes shook in shock. The smell was sweet with a faint scent of charcoal. The smell could easily stimulate his appetite. Without realizing it, his mouth was already watering as he watched the man in front of him gnaw on the glossy red meat. He couldn’t help but slurp his saliva back inside his mouth.

‘It looks really delicious……’

Aruvel had only one desire in his life and that was to once again taste the food from the human world.

But that guy is a human.

He did not know what he was up to and he kept on shouting in his head that he shouldn’t approach him but his feet were already bringing him near the man.

He could see the man placing some pickled onion on top of the seasoned meat. And when he was about to put it in his mouth……

“I, I want to try that.”

Aruvel came back to his senses when he suddenly spoke up.

My goodness! I almost fell for this cunning guy’s ulterior motive!

Then, the man said……

“We can’t attack each other in this barrier. If that’s the case, then I can’t do anything bad to you, right? Come on in, quickly.”

His words were stronger than the whispers of the three great demons.

“Are you sure that we can’t attack each other there?”

“Yes, please look carefully.”

The man lifted his sword and tried to use his skill but the red light that quickly flashed on his sword disappeared just as quickly.

‘It’s true.’

The thoughts in Sage Aruvel’s head quickly turned.

‘There’s no way that they will harm me there since they can’t attack me.’

And Sage Aruvel realized one important piece of information.

‘That’s right. When was the last time that I tasted human food? Once that barrier gets terminated and I have finished eating, I can just kill them by then.’

He laughed gleefully as he finally moved into the barrier. Once he stepped inside, Aruvel also tried to point his spear at him just to double check. At that exact same moment, an unidentified force controlled his attack.

‘It’s really true.’

That meant that he could eat freely. And once he was done eating he could kill this human being in front of him.

***

Aruvel hurriedly chomped on the pork galbi. Then, Minhyuk carefully placed the bibimnaengmyeon in front of him.

“This dish is called pork galbi, while this one is called naengmyeon. It’s best to eat them together.”

“Ahem, ahem. Right, I’ll give them a taste.”

Aruvel placed a piece of pork ribs on top of the glistening red noodles. Then, he slurped the noodles and ribs together. The spicy and sweet flavor of the noodles together with the soft and sweet taste of the meat spread in his mouth. Aruvel’s eyes widened in shock when he tasted such delicacy.

“It, It’s really delicious.”

He was struck with admiration.

Minhyuk couldn’t help but look at him with a bit of disgust when he saw Aruvel hurriedly devouring the dishes in front of him. However, this was the only plausible method since he knew better than anyone else that Aruvel longed for something delicious.

Then, Minhyuk took something out of his inventory.

Crack, crack, crack, crack―

The sound of cracking came when he turned and opened the lid. It was none other than soju. And it was even blueberry fruit soju.

“Well then, it’s delicious if we drink this together!”

“What’s this?”

“It’s a drink but it’s a superb combi with the food that we’re eating right now.”

Minhyuk smiled softly. He knew that Aruvel would try to avoid his urge to drink so he would not get drunk. However, fruit soju was sweet enough for it to be called a drink and Aruvel, who most likely did not have enough experience with human drinks, would most likely believe this.

Minhyuk poured the alcohol generously in the shot glass. Then, he drank the soju in one shot.

[You have an invincible body that can ignore and resist all abnormal states.]

Then, he got a notification.

When Aruvel saw that nothing happened to Minhyuk, he eagerly filled his shot glass with alcohol. Then, he drank it and said……

“Hoo? This is quite a curious drink. At first, it has a sweet and fruity flavor but there’s also a bitter and pungent aftertaste.”

“That’s the charm of this drink.”

“I see.”

Aruvel found the drink to be delicious as he gulped the contents of the glass in one shot. Then he said……

“One more glass.”

“Yes.”

One glass became two, then two became three, four and so on.

Then……

Crack, crack, crack, crack―

Without realizing it, Minhyuk had already opened a few more bottles.

“Kggghk. This tastes so good! The meat is good and the drink is also good.”

“Hahahahaha. Right?”

It was all going according to his plans.

***

While Minhyuk was eagerly offering drink after drink to Aruvel, Conir and Kongie sneakily came out of the barrier.

Conir was excitedly staring at the ramyeon that was starting to boil.

“Conir!!! This time will be a success!!!”

“Oink!”

Kongie nodded his head seriously with his arms folded on his chest. He had decided to teach Conir how to cook ramyeon so he was supervising his work right now.

Not long after, Conir was able to cook ramyeon. The ramyeon was piping hot with steam blowing above it. However, a notification rang loudly in Conir’s head.

[You have failed the Quest: Cooking Lv1 Best Ramyeon.]

“.......”

Conir felt sad.

This notification was thanks to his ‘tenacity’ skill. With this ‘tenacity’ skill, Conir would tenaciously focus on one task as various quests pop out. He would be able to obtain skills as rewards if he succeeded in the quests. This was the privilege that only NPC Conir could have.

Kongie approached Conir when he saw him looking at the ramyeon sadly with his doe-like eyes.

“Oooink.”

It’s alright, Conir.

“Oiink, oiink.”

You’ll be able to reach my level someday too.

“Oooooooink.”

Don’t be discouraged by your failures.

“Oink, oink.”

I will teach you today.

“Teach?”

“Oink, oink.”

Conir finally responded to the word ‘teach’. Kongie nodded his head at him. Then, he proceeded to speak to him with a grave and somber expression on his face.

“Oink, oink.”

“I’ll find out soon?”

Conir waited as he stared at his ramyeon. His eyes couldn’t help but widen in shock when something happened ten minutes later.

Kongie smiled quietly as he looked at the distant mountains with his hands behind his back.

Conir trembled as he looked at the ramyeon with admiration and awe.

“Woa…… Woooooooow……. The, there’s a lot of ramyeon!”

Kongie nodded slowly as he tapped him on his shoulders.

“Oiiink.”

This is exactly what I meant when I told you that I will teach you.

It was a lesson where the amount of ramyeon increases even if you did not do anything. Kongie patted his shoulders once again as he turned his back on him. Then, he slowly moved away from him with his hands behind his back. He looked like an absolute master in these wide rivers and lakes with his posture. His expression even showed sadness as if he was feeling the nostalgia of his oldest disciple leaving the nest.

And Conir who was staring at his desolate back……

“Co, Conir…… W, wants to be like K, Kongie…… Conir! Will be like you!”

Strangely enough, Conir suddenly wanted to be like Kongie.

***

Minhyuk’s plan was finally getting ripe.

“Pour me another glass.”

Glug, glug, glug―

Gulp, gulp, gulp!

“Kggghk! Thwis dhrink ish really delishcious! In the old days!”

It has begun.

This was the sound of an adult man getting drunk.

In the old days!

Then, he started again.

“So in the old days!!!”

They would continue to say this again and again and again.

“I used to be very……! Huh?!”

Their stories would always begin with ‘In the old days’ and they would continue to speak about their success. Then, they stop.

“Haa……”

His misty eyes stared despondently at the distant mountains as he began to shed tears.

“What’s so wrong about living my demon life……”

When this moment came, Minhyuk nodded his head as he patted his back gently.

Pat, pat―

“It’s okay. Everything is just like that. Human life…… n, no, de, demon life is just like that. Right?”

“Thanks. It feels good to be comforted.”

​ “Come on, have another drink.”

“Right. Boy, you’re a very good person. This, this……”

He suddenly began to search all over his own body. Then, he took something out and stuck it out to Minhyuk’s face.

“Come on, take this. Pocket money, this is pocket money!”

When they arrived at the final stage, Aruvel gave him some pocket money!

A notification rang in Minhyuk’s head as he received his pocket money.

[You have acquired 210 platinum.]

“......”

Minhyuk stared blankly as he received a 210 platinum pocket money. If it was exchanged for cash, it would be exchanged for billions of cold hard cash.

But Aruvel stared at him blearily as he continued to speak.

“But boy, this is really delicious. This is the best dish that I’ve had in the world.”

“Thank you.”

Minhyuk smiled softly at his praise.

Aruvel suddenly turned silent as he pondered deeply about something before asking Minhyuk.

“Boy, will I be able to keep eating something delicious if I’m with you?”

“I guess?”

“Hic?”

Aruvel pulled something out from his sleeves again. Then, he wrote down some letters before giving them to Minhyuk.

“Then I’ll go with you.”

At the same time, the notifications rang for Minhyuk.

[Aruvel has created a pledge of allegiance.]

[He won’t be able to attack you for 1 week.]

[The pledge of allegiance has taken effect.]

[The effects of the pledge of allegiance will reduce the NPC’s abilities significantly if the pledge was made by an NPC that has a higher level than you.]

“......”

An unexpected variable suddenly appeared in his plans.

***

Notes

[Galbi, Ribs] - This means the same thing. I will use them interchangeably.

[Rivers and Lakes] - 강호 (Kangho), there are three meanings to this: 1) Refers to Jiangxi (Kangseo) and Hunan (Honam), the most central region in China’s geography. This is the Jianghu that we always see in CN novels. 2) Kang refers to a river, the Yangtze River, and Ho refers to a lake, the Dongjeong Lake. 3) Literally rivers and lakes, since humans can’t survive without rivers and lakes it takes on the alternate meaning of the world in which us human’s live. Remember that the first civilization was made near rivers and lakes. I am not too sure about the authenticity of these so if anyone can confirm, please feel free to do so. Anyway, I used Rivers and Lakes because Jianghu does not sound correct since this is a KR novel. But with regards to the three meanings, we can say that it is talking about the area where humans live and thrive.

Food Discussion Corner

Bibim Naengmyeon - Korean spicy cold noodles. The spicy red noodles. They’re strangely refreshing despite being spicy.

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