I Swear I Don't Have A Python In My Pool

Mmmm…

It seemed that he was just shy of a double evolution. However, that did not deter him, as he had a number of rewards to open.

Cutting right to the chase, Wang Mang muttered, “System, open a Diamond Treasure Chest!”

[Ding! Congratulations! Diamond Treasure Chest successfully opened!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 5 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 5 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 7 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 8 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a certain Red Empire female celebrity’s underwear!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a certain Red Empire male celebrity’s home-made video!]

Wang Mang was speechless.

Although the 25 billion evolution value was pretty decent, what was with the last two prizes?

Was the system trying to determine which way he swung? Did it matter? He was a snake now, not a human!

Fortunately, he had grown used to seeing these crappy prizes. There would always be one or two whenever he activated a gacha or opened a treasure chest.

Getting back on track…

“System, open another Diamond Treasure Chest!”

[Ding! Congratulations! Diamond Treasure Chest successfully opened!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 5 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a carton of milk!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a fine ancient sword!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a Bluefin Tuna!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a box of canned beef!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a signed golf ball!]

Holy f*ck!

This was the most trashy Diamond Treasure Chest he had ever opened!

Was the system trying to get in the way of his double evolution?

No matter what, he had to try.

“System, open the last Diamond Treasure Chest!”

[Ding! Congratulations! Diamond Treasure Chest successfully opened!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 10 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 20 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a pack of toilet paper!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a bottle of antibacterial cream!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a Cadillac!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a bag of Kopi Luwak!]

Well, although there were four useless rewards, at the very least he believed that he would be able to evolve twice now.

Hmm…

Now, the question was whether he should evolve, or use one of the other rewards he had in his possession.

After all, he still had a Specified Wheel of Fortune and a Top-grade Gacha!

Thinking this, Wang Mang decided to go for a triple evolution.

“System, activate the Top-grade Gacha!”

[Ding! Congratulations! Successfully activated the Top-grade Gacha!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 20 billion evolution value!]

F*ck yeah!

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a roasted pig!]

F*ckno!

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained 10 billion evolution value!]

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a refrigerator!]

Sigh…

The up and down cycle continued once more.

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained a pair of flip-flops!]

System!

Please!

Have mercy!

30 billion evolution value was decent, but it was not enough to evolve again!

Then…

The system’s voice rang out for the sixth time.

[Ding! Congratulations! Obtained Tier 3…]