BXBX NOVEL Chapter 17: Just One Last Time
The system remained silent. No encouraging words, no reassurance.
Lucian let out a bitter sigh, feeling the weight of his own hopelessness. "I was the problem. It was me all along. Why should they love me, anyway? If they felt it, they’d show it. But they didn’t." His hands clenched tightly around the bouquet of Kadupul flowers, delicate petals already wilting.
"I thought... if I just showed them how much I loved them, if I gave and gave until there was nothing left... they’d notice. They’d finally see me."
He paused, staring at the fragile flowers in his hands. "But they didn’t. Again and again, they rejected me. And I... I kept trying, hoping that maybe, just maybe, one day they’d see it." His voice trembled, the overwhelming sadness choking him. "I thought if I gave everything I had, if I showed them how much they meant to me, they’d eventually love me back.
But they never did."
Lucian’s breath hitched as his eyes burned with unshed tears. He felt a surge of emotion building up inside him, threatening to spill over. "I was so stupid, so pathetic." His voice cracked. "I was being petty, acting like a villain in my own story, but I just couldn’t let go. I couldn’t let go of the people I loved more than myself."
The system finally responded, its tone mechanical but laced with an odd understanding. [Host, you were never the villain. There is something pure in one-sided love. Many believe it to be the truest form of love, the most selfless, because you love without expectation.]
Lucian chuckled darkly, shaking his head. "One-sided love, huh?" He stared up at the sky, his vision blurring. "Yeah, I guess that’s what it was. But it’s over now." He tried to speak with conviction, but his words sounded hollow even to himself. "I gave it my all in my last life, and I couldn’t have done more. That was it.
That was my limit." His voice trembled, as if he were on the verge of breaking.
The pain in his chest grew sharper, more suffocating, and he exhaled shakily. "I’m not being prideful, you know? Or... maybe I am. But when I said I wouldn’t love them again, it wasn’t out of spite. I’m just...
tired. So damn tired."
Lucian’s voice cracked as the memories of his past life flooded his mind, memories he wished he could erase. "You know what real pain is, system?" he asked, his eyes filling with unshed tears. "It’s when you want to talk to someone, when you want nothing more than to be with them... but you know they don’t feel the same. You know they don’t want you. But still, you reach out, hoping they’ll notice.
That’s when you feel pain. That’s when it hurts the most."
He choked on the words, unable to suppress the raw emotion in his voice. "I can’t do it anymore, system. I can’t take that kind of pain again. I gave up everything, even my life, for love. And look where it got me." He pressed his hand to his chest, his heart aching with the weight of all that had been lost.
[Host, let it go.] The system’s voice was soft, almost soothing. [You’ve been given a second chance. Don’t waste it on the same mistakes. This time, you can try something new. You can find another love, someone who will give you the love you deserve.]
Lucian let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. "No. Love isn’t for me. Not anymore. Maybe love happens for some people twice, but not for me. I’m done." His voice was resolute, but beneath the surface, there was still an ocean of pain.
"You don’t understand, system," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I’m broken. I don’t want to feel that kind of pain again. Ever. The wounds are too deep. There’s no coming back from this." He exhaled deeply, his hand trembling against his chest.
"I’m not looking for love anymore. I just want to live alone, far away from anything that can hurt me."
The system remained silent for a moment before responding. [I will always be with you, host. No matter what. And just so you know, every skill and reward you received from the system in your last life everything is still with you now.]
Lucian let out a soft sigh. "It doesn’t matter. I’m not in the mood for that anymore." He glanced down at the Kadupul flowers in his hand, their delicate petals beginning to wilt. "What a waste," he murmured to himself, staring at the fleeting beauty of the flowers. "These are so rare, and they won’t even last more than a few hours after being plucked. They’re just...
like me, I guess. Beautiful for a moment, but gone before anyone really notices."
He remembered the painstaking effort it had taken to grow them. Six months. He had grown these flowers with his own hands, hoping to show Avey just how much he cared. He had planned everything down to the last detail, knowing the flowers would only survive for a couple of hours after being picked. He had wanted to show her his dedication, his love, his sacrifice.
He had thought hoped that it would make her see him, even for just a second.
But now, standing there with the bouquet in his hands, Lucian felt nothing but emptiness. The flowers meant nothing anymore. They were just a reminder of how foolish he had been.
He stared at the entrance to the hotel for a long moment, his heart heavy with indecision. He knew Avey was inside. He had arranged this meeting long ago. Everything had been perfectly timed. He had been so desperate to make her see his love that he had pulled out all the stops, made sure nothing could go wrong.
But now... he didn’t want to see her. He didn’t want to face the woman who had unknowingly shattered his heart time and time again. He didn’t want to remember the pain.
Lucian turned his body away from the hotel, his feet heavy as he took a few steps in the opposite direction. He didn’t need to do this. He didn’t need to see her. He was free now. He could leave it all behind.
But then, he stopped.
His heart clenched painfully in his chest, and his breathing grew shallow. "Just... one last time," he whispered to himself. His emotions were waging war inside him, and he couldn’t suppress the need to see her. Just once. Just for a moment.
He wanted to know if the woman he had given his heart to literally and figuratively looks good...he just couldn’t forget her face before the operation...the heart failure she was looking very weak.
now its like that never happened but only Lucian know how much in pain he was when avey was in hospital he could even breath and feel...all he could feel was heartache i mean her heart might not have hurt that much even with heart failure
Lucian just wanted to see her healthy face and be over with it no more... just one look from far away
"Just once," he repeated, convincing himself that this would be the last time. The last time he would let her haunt him.
Lucian turned around and began walking toward the hotel entrance, each step heavier than the last. His mind screamed at him to stop, to walk away, but his heart his broken, fragile heart pushed him forward.
Because no matter how much pain he had endured, no matter how many promises he had made to himself, he couldn’t forget her. He couldn’t erase the love he had felt, the hope he had clung to for so long. Feelings can’t be killed that easily, even when they hurt.
"Just one last time."
Lucian pushed open the door to the hotel, his heart racing in his chest.
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here are we guys hope you like how the story is going
don’t forget to give some love to author..... author just like Lucian is very hungry..hehe